JOE
AKA: Rick, Song Writer Extraordinaire, token Filipino guy

Measurements: 10"x2" (size of his hairspray can)

Catchphrases: "I need a smoke," "Goddam geeky prepoid," "Oh, fuck this, I can't take it anymore.

Sexual Fantasy: I am every woman's fantasy. Love me, touch me, feel me.

Description: What can we say about Joe that hasn't already been said before? He has bad hair, he smokes too much, and he dresses like a geek. Other than that, he's an okay guy. An integral pant of the Skule Nite Social Committee, Joe's lyrics and musical ability set him a class above the rest, even if he only seems to know one tune.

Pet Peeves: Don't touch the hair!, dressing up as a geek, Thia.

Aspirations: Lead singer in the world's #1 band, to be recognized for more than my hair.

If I could have changed the show: Less songs For Dan.

Typecast: Lead Singer type.

Most likely to: See aspirations.

ALEX H
AKA: Hatz, Goldilad, Scotty

Measurements: 25"(2")

Catchphrases: Anything Scottish.

Sexual Fantasy: An evening of passion with any of four female cast members (see if you can figure it out, girls).

Description: Hatz was often found in the stairwell turning red and hyperventilating while trying to learn some dance or another. He's also been seen snapping his fingers and running around in a cheesy blonde wig. A word of caution to future Skule Nite cast. Do NOT interrupt Hatz while he is dancing. The results could be catastrophic. He's a great guy, a bastard of a Scotsman and an all around panty animal even though he's finally employed. A part-time male model, Hatz is also a member of The Skule Nite 9T5 Social Committee.

Pet Peeves: G-sharps, my lovin', dancing in general.

Aspirations: To write for Saturday Night Live.

If I could have changed the show: My sketches would have been done properly!

Typecast: If it's got an accent, it's one of Hatz's roles.

Most Likely To: Direct one of these years...